More than a dog

As I write this post, I keep thinking this isn't real . . .  but sadly my nine month old puppy Finnegan was struck by a car on Monday and passed away in my mother's arms on the way to the vet. I'm not entirely sure how it happened, let alone why, but what I do know is that I'm crushed.

I brought Finn into my life two weeks after my father passed. I had wanted a dog of my own for years and it seemed like the right time to help take my mind off of such a devastating loss. And what a character Finn was. I won't lie, the first few months were tough, as we navigated through the puppy stages. But as Finn grew, he became such a wonderful dog and it just doesn't seem fair how tragically he was taken from us.

I look at pictures I've taken over the past few months of Finn (and trust me there were a lot) and I just cannot believe he is no longer here. It feels like I've been punched in my stomach. He had a unique personality, a very talkative, funny dog. He loved to sleep like a person in bed and wake you up with his big eyes, sweet kisses and quiet whines. He was becoming quite the runner too, finally taking to the leash really well. He was my dog...attached at the hip...and I loved him. I couldn't take him anywhere without someone saying he was the "most beautiful dog I've ever seen." I could see the future ahead of us....Finn coming for rides with me in my car, lots of runs at the park, growing old and becoming calm and quiet...I guess it just wasn't mean to be.

I know people keep telling me, "he's with your dad now," and while I guess
that's supposed to comfort me, sadly it doesn't. The whole point of having Finn was so he'd be with me, since my Dad no longer was. I feel cheated really . . . no dog deserves what happened to Finn, let alone one so young.

I have experienced a massive amount of loss this year. I'm baffled how I even have tears left to cry. In the end I guess I'm just glad I had Finn for the time I did...he was a bright spot in an otherwise dark year.

Rest well my sweet, sweet Finny boy.

Where did Summer go?

Somehow it's the end of July (which was when I was planning on posting this...but now it's August). I'm not really sure where this summer went . . . but given how hot and humid it's been, I won't lie, I'm ready for fall weather.

Obviously I failed in my attempt to update my blog every day I was in Europe. It was a valiant effort though. Between the time difference and long days, by the time I got back to my hotel, I was exhausted. I did manage to catch up on Dexter though, so I feel somewhat accomplished. With that said, here are a few photos from the trip:



























Looks like my next big trip will be Belize in March with my best friend, CS. Every other year, we try to pick a new place to explore and from the photos I have seen, Belize will not disappoint.

 Otherwise, a few highlights from my summer:

1. Sadly, Uncle Luke passed away. Aunt Judy had called me while I was in France and we spoke about his condition. I was hoping to have the opportunity to say goodbye, but it wasn't in the cards. I can only hope he knew how much he meant to me. I attended his internment last week, which ended up being very difficult for me. It really opened my eyes to how raw the wounds still are from my Dad's passing. Uncle Luke's memorial service was yesterday. I'm sure he and Dad are laughing and telling stories together in Heaven.

2. I was finally able to get together with my good friend CG. We went to Avalon a few weeks ago and lucked out with some great weather at the beach. It was so nice to catch up. Our lives get so busy sometimes and I was surprised that we hadn't seen each other since the funeral.

3. I'm signed up for four races this summer. Apparently I'm a glutton for punishment. I'm running in my third Lynchburg Half Marathon on August 10. I don't really feel that prepared, because it's just been so hot to run long distances (although I have been very good about crossfit). I ran eight miles on Sunday, which actually went really well. I'm planning on running 10 today, which is my last run before the race. Ultimately, it will just have to be a matter of will I guess to get through the 13.1 on race day. I hate feeling so unprepared, but it's my own fault. At least crossfit has really helped with my endurance. I'm also running the Wendy's Wonderful Kids 10K with my brother at the end of August. Then I'm signed up for the Philadelphia Rock and Roll Half with my friend JS, and finally, we're both running in a half marathon relay in October at Hershey Park. My goal was to end up with four new medals this year, and God willing, that should be the case.

4. It wouldn't be a blog post if I didn't give a quick update on Finn. He's getting so big! We've cut his hair twice this summer to help with the heat. I even started running with him and he's not that bad...although cars are still of way too much interest to him. I see great runs in this little dogs future.

So just a short update. Hoping to get a few more blog posts in before the end of the summer.

Til then, stay cool!

Something is missing

Well I am in Brussels, but I can't say the same for my luggage. Before I dive in there, let me share some more details on Monaco.

I have to say, it was really something to wake up every morning to dozens of yachts on the Mediterranean. It was absolutely beautiful. Every day, when I walked to the conference location, I walked along the water. It was really quite a view.

On Wednesday night, my work duties were over and the conference treated us to a 007 themed event, with an open air concert, lots of food, and a little 007 show. My colleague and I also had the opportunity to super-impose our faces and live out our 007 dreams.

This morning I hopped a helicopter...yes, a helicopter to Nice from Monaco. Oddly enough, the helicopter was cheaper, faster, and generally more efficient than a cab. That is, not where my luggage was concerned. I checked my bag when I arrived at the Heli Airport and it was supposed to go all the way to Brussels. However, when I arrived in Brussels, my bag was no where to be found. Honestly, I wasn't really surprised, because it wouldn't be a trip if something didn't go wrong.

I went to the Brussels Airways desk and made my complaint. Oddly enough, even though my bag was tagged and marked, they couldn't tell me where my bag was. All they could say was that it wasn't scanned in Brussels...huh, really? No kidding.

I'm not confident I'll see my bag any time soon. The attendant said he thinks it will arrive in Brussels tomorrow morning, but how can he really know when he doesn't even know where my bag is? Thankfully, since I lost my bag in Orlando, I've learned my lesson and I keep all my essentials in my carry-on: makeup, contact solution, underwear, and my toothbrush. Although I should remind myself next time to include an actual hairbrush - I won't be looking so pretty tomorrow morning.

So after realizing I had no bag, I did manage to find the train station in the airport and get myself to the Brussels Central station. And then I sort of struggled finding my hotel. I had saved directions on my cell phone, but without internet access, it was hard to tell where I was really. The streets aren't marked as nicely as they are in other countries. So I just started following signs to the Grand Place, which I knew was close to my hotel. I managed to find it, although I will be honest, I wasn't sure if it was REALLY the Grand Place. But it was very big...very place like...and lots of people were there, so I assume I found it. Yet, I didn't know where my hotel was in relation to the Place, just that it was close by.

I eventually asked a waiter who was at an outside cafe and he directed me perfectly to my hotel - which is quite nice by the way.

I had planned to go for a run tonight, but without my bag, I'm stuck. Although I probably should go tour Brurssels, I have to admit, I'm plain exhausted. I plan to take a shower and hang out in my hotel room tonight. Tomorrow I head to Bruges and Ghent on a tour. Saturday I spend here in the city and I'm off to Luxembourg on Sunday.

Until next time, please pray for my bag's safe and quick return!

Bonjour!

Greetings from Monaco. It's about 11 p.m. here and I'm simply beat. It's been a very long day and I'm going on 32 hours of pretty much no sleep.

I'd like to say my travel here was uneventful, but it's me, so that's never the case. I was at the back of the plane on my flight to Paris and of course, my seat was broken, so I had to sleep straight up and down...no reclining for me. But I did meet a race car driver from New Zealand and we chatted most of the flight.

Just when we thought we were going to land in Paris, the pilot let us know we were circling the airport because Paris was undergoing some difficult weather A few minutes later, he let us know the airport was in fact closed and we were low on fuel, so we headed for Brussels instead. After spending an hour on the ground in Brussels, we finally arrived in Paris. At least my five hour layover was only two!

When I got to Nice, the airport was basically dead, except for the dozens of people waiting for a cab. I ended up with a really nice cab driver. He asked if I spoke French and I let him know I did, but from that moment on he only spoke to me in French. Running on no sleep, my brain hurt trying to keep up, although I managed to get about 75 percent of what he was saying.

When I got to my hotel, I was completely exhausted, but the view from my room is amazing. I literally overlook the ocean, with yachts in the distance.

I went to dinner at La Note Bleue with some colleagues - it was great getting to know so many colleagues from around the world.

Tomorrow the real work begins, although I have been working on some things this evening.

For now though, my bed is calling my name.

On the road again . . .

Well, my bags are packed (sort of . . . ok not at all) and I'm off on another adventure. This time, I'm headed to Monaco for a work event, and then spending a week on vacation in Belgium and France. I'll also be making a quick trip to Luxembourg (because seriously, when will I ever have the opportunity to go to Luxembourg) in between.

This year, I've already traveled to Toronto and Nashville . . . I was originally headed to Amsterdam (with some work time in Paris), but that trip obviously didn't happen.

And of course, this time around, I'm facing the same challenges and dilemmas with packing, as I usually do. Trying to make the weight requirements and making sure I have enough space to bring lots of presents home. Belgium Air has some seriously strict luggage policies...as in one carry-on per person. Not a bag and your pursue...or a bag and a briefcase - literally one carry-one. Period.

This time around though, I'm a little nervous about the fashion requirements in little ol' Monaco. It just happens to be the most wealthy country per square mile in umm, the world. So let's just say, they take their fashion seriously. Apparently there's a very strict dress code to enter the casinos - which obviously I don't plan to do, since I am going for work. But our after-event celebration is at the Monte Carlo casino. I'm not about to pack a gown, but I did find a nice little green number I think will do the trick.

My goal is to blog throughout my trip...which I've never done. Usually I just post Facebook updates and then write a quick blog after my trip - because I'm too tired to go into too much detail. But this time, I'm going to try and commit to blogging each day of my trip - even the work days (that goal might be a little more difficult)! There will probably be more photos than words, but it's something!

I am pretty excited to visit some more international crossfit boxes. I've scoped them out and I've found one in Monaco, Brussels, and Paris. Here's hoping I can make it to at least one and add to my ever-growing t-shirt collection.

I'm spending four days in Belgium by myself, before staying with Eric, Sandrine, and the children. I was originally a little apprehensive - I tried to convince my friend CG to ditch her boyfriend and come with me, no dice - but I'm actually looking forward to some alone time, in a foreign country, where I can just think about the past few months. Ironically, while things are still difficult and I still find myself in tears some days, I do feel like things are looking up. Someone once told me things will never get better...they'll never get easier...but somehow you manage to get through it. I guess this is me getting through it.

So just a few more days until I set sail...errr flight. Bon voyage!

Puppy Lessons

So it's June. Not really sure where this year has gone...hard to believe it's half over and what a half year it has been. Believe it or not, I'm already ready for 2014.

But with that said, one of the joys in my life, Finn, is growing like a weed! And boy what an education this little pup has given me. Let me share with you the lessons I've learned in just the past two and a half months Finn has graced me with his ever excited presence.

1. I am in no way ready to have children . . . like seriously - The first few weeks after bringing Finn home, I felt like a new parent. I was sleep deprived, getting up every couple of hours to let Finn out. I was cranky, stressed, wondering what was I thinking? I dealt with accidents, both small and large, chewed up shoes and other items, crying at night, the whole gambit. It was hard...it still is, although it's getting easier. He even whines! He makes the most childish noises, it's hilarious, but also incredibly frustrating! So while I do hope to have my own blessed little bundles of joy . . .one day . . . that day is no where near close!

2. Puppies = Friends - Let's be honest, Finn is the cutest dog ever. People yards away notice him and come running. If I had a penny for every time someone told me he was the "cutest dog I've ever seen." I'd be a million aware twice over. And as such, he's helped me to get to know my neighbors better. In fact, I think my neighbors know Finn better than they know me. The minute we walk out the door, I hear people shouting his name. He's a full blown celebrity.

3. No household item is safe - Although the chewing has subsided substantially, all items, small and large, were prey for Finn. Especially flip flops, underwear, bras, socks, sunglasses, the works. Even when I think I've put everything safely out of reach, Finn manages to sniff it out. Thank goodness he's growing out of this stage.

4. I need a bigger bed - I left Finn with my mother while I was on a work trip. When I came back, he was no longer a "sleep in your crate dog." Instead, she turned him into a "I must sleep in your bed dog." Let's just say I wasn't thrilled. Especially since Finn is a mover. He readjusts positions at least thirty times at night...we're trying to carve out one spot for him to stick too...it's working, slowly. But with that said, my mother has a queen bed, so it's much roomier than my little full. Needless to say, I'll be upgrading shortly.

5. When dogs disappear, they're usually up to no good - In fact, they're probably pooping, or chewing your underwear or bra, eating your computer cord. . . Moral of this little story, puppies are not trustworthy!

I can't say I've kept my cool through all of this. There have been moments where I've said to myself, "What the hell were you thinking?" But mostly, I really love this little guy. Especially when he gives you that look . . . you know the look. That's all I need to reaffirm why I brought this little man into my life afterall.

Meet Finn

Obviously the past few months have been difficult..beyond words. But to help brighten our days, my mom and I decided to jump off the deep end and buy a puppy. While he's incredibly challenging and makes me not want to have children of my own for quite a few more years, he is a furry bundle of joy, who we named Finnegan, or Finn for short.

Let me tell you, this aussiedoodle (Australian Shepherd/Poodle) is a handful. He's very attached to me, but also thinks he's the boss, so more often than not, these days you can hear me shouting, "NO!" "Aahhuhh!" "Drop it!" "Sit!" "Stay!" "ahhh kill me!" He's truly putting my dog training skills to the test and I will admit, I am no Dog Whisperer, although if he's ever in the CT area, give him my address!

One thing is for sure, he is a cutie. In fact, it's not me who gets the cat calls these days, it's him! People literally roll down their windows as I take him for walks, shouting he's the cutest dog they've ever seen. Yeah, yeah. Try housebreaking the cutest thing you've ever seen - it's not so cute.

I know once we get past this stage, he's going to be a great dog. And I'm counting down the days until he's six months, so I can start taking him on runs. Although the short practice runs we've done so far, he's tried to bite my legs off. We'll have to work on that. Did I mentioned his teeth are sharp? Because you only need to look at my finger, or my flip flops to tell that they are indeed little weapons of mass destruction.

I'm making him seem worse than he is. When he's fast asleep on my lap at the end of the day, he's the sweetest little thing. I even took him to Tarrywhile Park yesterday and it was such a joy to romp around the park with him for a couple of hours. And it was even better when he was passed out all afternoon.

I see a bright future for this little man and me...

Daddy's Little Girl

I realize I haven't blogged in a few months. And I had every intention of writing about a slew of things, that in hindsight seem rather pointless, especially now that my life has changed forever.

I spent a week and a half in February visiting my parents in Arizona. I knew my Dad hadn't been feeling too well, but I was hoping he'd feel better and come home to Pennsylvania in April on the mend. My entire trip, he was ill. His stomach hurt, he felt nauseous, didn't want to eat. I even went with him to the doctor to see what was wrong and they told him he probably had caught the stomach bug that was going around at the time. Their suggestion was yet more pills, adding to the dozens he was already taking for a slew of other things.

Despite not feeling well, he still tried to make my vacation memorable. He took me horseback riding and brought me to an orange grove I had been wanting to visit. He took me out for dinner and drove me to stores he wanted me to see...even though most of the time he waited for us in the car.

The night before I left, I spent the evening watching television with my Dad. He kept telling me he couldn't believe my trip was over and how fast the time had gone and how he wished I didn't have to leave. Little did I know, I'd be back in just a couple of weeks.

After I flew home, my dad's back began to hurt immensely. He finally gave in and went to the emergency room to find out what was causing all the pain. The doctors discovered a tumor in his spine, which he had had for a number of years had begun to grow and inadvertently cracked his vertebrae in the process. But to determine what caused the sudden growth, the doctors decided to run more tests.

I knew the answer to those tests wouldn't be good...I had had an eerie feeling the past few months that something wasn't right...If only I had been wrong.

My mom called me on a Saturday and told me to cancel my work trip to Europe and fly to Arizona right away - Dad had stage IV small cell carcinoma in his right lung, which had already spread to his liver. On Sunday, I sat in the White Plains airport terminal, as my mom further updated me that my dad only had four to six months to live. I sat there for what seemed forever just crying, tears streaming down my face. Even as I boarded the plane, I couldn't stop the tears, they just kept coming.

That next day, I saw my dad in the hospital. I had to leave the room at first, it was too emotional for me. He was on so much pain medicine, it wasn't him. He knew who I was, but I could see that things were far worse than I had expected. I had come to Arizona with hope...hope he'd get better, hope I'd be able to bring him home, hope I wouldn't lose my dad. But when the doctor came in to speak with me, some of that hope was torn away when he told me that my father was not a candidate for chemotherapy and that in fact, he only had a few weeks left.

A few weeks? A few weeks? I kept asking, how did we go from four to six months to a few weeks? How did my Dad go from being fine over Christmas to now only having a few weeks left on this earth? Despite my puffy eyes and tear stained face, I went into Amanda PR mode and started planning and calling and arranging things. I was determined to get my dad out of the hospital and home to Pennsylvania. I really thought I had a chance.

That day, Dad was released to a rehabilitation facility, which was meant to help him gain strength in his legs, so we could bring him home to Pennsylvania. That night was difficult. Transferring my dad from the hospital to the center took a lot out of him and mom and I cried the entire ride home that night, thinking that was it. To our surprise though, the next morning my Dad looked pretty good. He was even talking a bit, which he wasn't doing the day before. They had him out of bed and in a wheel chair. It was progress. Maybe we could bring him home.

Over the next few days, family and friends flew in to see my Dad and say their final goodbyes. That Wednesday, Dad and I sat together for lunch. He was talking more now and more himself. He asked me what was wrong with him and what kind of timeframe he was looking at. He said, "what's my prognosis?" I had wanted my mother to be there, but he insisted I tell him and he promised, "I won't tell mom you told me." I held his hand and as the tears streamed down my face, I said, "Dad you have Stage IV lung cancer and it has already spread. You're not a candidate for chemo, so the doctors are saying . . .  you only have a few weeks left." I will never forget the look on his face...the shock in his eyes. I quickly said, "But you know how much I love you right?" and my dad replied, with his strong determination, "You know how much I love you?"

The days that followed, my dad did seem to come back to us. We had real conversations and he was lucid. I spent that Friday night watching television with him...Blue Bloods, our favorite show to watch together. He asked me if I thought we were doing the right thing...not pursuing chemo and actually going ahead with direct injection radiation in his spine to help reduce the tumor size and the pain, in order to bring him to PA. I told him I did and he said he thought it was the right thing too. He thanked me for being there with him and I said I love being here with you. He said, I wish you could be here all the time. He even called to check on me and make sure I got back to the house alright that night.

The day before he left the rehab center, my mother and brother and I surrounded my dad as he gave us instructions and told us how much we meant to him. I couldn't help but cry. I asked him if he'd get strong enough to dance with me to what would have been my father-daughter dance song, "Through the Years" by Kenny Rogers. He said, "I'm going to try." I told him how much I loved him, that he was my best friend and that he was supposed to be there for my wedding. He said what he always said, "I'll always be there." I told him I'd probably talk to him every day and he said, "I'll be listening" and he promised he'd ask God to hurry and send me the person I was supposed to be with.

His oncologist had him come home to the house in Arizona that Sunday. At least he could be comfortable there. I took him to the radiation oncologist that Tuesday. It was a tough day. They gave him a very large dose of radiation and he got very sick when we brought him home. He basically slept into the next day. Wednesday he was in and out. He started to say random things and wasn't eating. We moved him to a hospital bed in his room and decided to bring in hospice. I didn't notice it at the time, because my Dad always had breathing problems, but the death rattle started on Wednesday. I did notice how swollen his stomach was and I knew the end was close. I told him that day, that it was ok, he could go. That he didn't have to stay for me, I'd take care of our family and it was time for him to be with my brother Stephen. Funny enough, a couple of hours later (I think he was processing things at different times) he said to me, "I'm in no hurry Amanda."

That night he was delusional, saying things that didn't make sense and it was like he was somewhere else. At one point, I asked him, "Who's your daughter?" And even though he was slipping, he looked at me and firmly pointed to me. So I know he knew who I was and that I was with him.

I slept in his room that night. Every few hours, I'd wake up, hearing him talk. Finally around 5:30 a.m. he started to speak loudly. He said, "I don't know Will." Then he said, "It's so white." I said, "What's so white daddy?" He replied, "It's just so white." I then rubbed his head and said, "shhhh, it's ok daddy. Close your eyes, go to sleep."  Around 6:15 a.m. I left the room to sleep in my own bed for a few hours. I woke up around 7:15 and finally went into his room at 7:30. My mom was sleeping, but the room was eerily quiet...still. I looked at my dad...it was like he was sleeping, but I knew something was wrong. I paused and ached to hear him breath, but I didn't...he chest wasn't rising. I ran to his side and touched his hand, "Daddy?" But as soon as I touched his hand, I knew...he was cold...he was gone.

I woke my mom...I told her I thought Daddy was gone and he was. I watched her try to wake the love of her life, gut wrenching sobs filling the house. I left the room and almost collapsed with grief, crying so hard and so deep, my abdominal muscles actually ached the next day.

On March 14 around 7:15 a.m., my Dad left this earth. I read that people often wait for the person they feel most protective of to leave the room before passing. And although I wish I had been holding my father's hand as he left this world for the next, I'm filled with incredible love knowing I was that person for him.

The next few days were a blur, filled with funeral arrangements and sympathy cards, and phone calls, and flowers, and family. I arranged my father's funeral and gave the final eulogy I can only hope he was proud of how it all turned out.

In September or October of last year, I had watched an Oprah Winfrey interview with Chris Christie of all people. He recounted how he was with his mother a few days before she died. His mother said to him, "Chris, why are you here? Get back to work, there's nothing left unsaid between us." I mentioned that to my dad one day, when we were in the car. I said, I want that to be the case with you and me. My dad didn't miss a beat, he said to me, "It already is. You know how much I love you." So, I find peace and comfort in knowing my Dad and I were so close that there is nothing else I would have or should have said. He knew it all. But it still doesn't ease the immense pain and loss I feel in my heart.

We always knew he wouldn't be here forever...probably me more than anyone else. But I thought he'd have more time. I thought he'd see me fall in love and get married and I prayed he'd meet his grandchildren. But what's to be is to be.  The tears at this point are just too much, so I should probably close my little novel with this...My dad lived a great life despite it all and I can only hope he'll continue to walk with me for the rest of my life...always in my heart.

Craving something sweet

So, this marks my third week on the paleo diet and although I've managed to avoid all those things I thought I'd struggle with giving up, I have started to feel the need for something sweet. I started with freezing banana chunks, which have been great. But I find I tend to eat way too many bananas in a day this way.

I made a quick stop at Trader Joe's yesterday and perused their dried fruit section. Most everything was sweetened or freeze dried, which I don't like because the strawberries are more like flakes than anything I can sink my teeth into.

As I kept looking, I came across "Just Mango Slices," which were unsulfured and unsweetened. I've got to admit, my expectations were pretty low. I was expecting the mango to taste more like cardboard. When I opened the package, the strong smell of mango was divine. This really elevated my expectations, which honestly, were not let down! The mango was so good, chewy and sweet and just so tasty. In fact, I'm almost done with the package and it's been a day!

The package says the serving size is four pieces, which is about 120 calories. No fat of course. I probably eat about six slices in a sitting, although today I've had a few more than that! I'm really surprised at how tasty it is. I'm planning on buying another pack for my trip to Delaware this weekend, although I need to be careful not to overdose on this! Definitely a really tasty snack that satisfies the sweet tooth.

It's the simple things that keep you happy and help you through paleo!

To a new year and new adventures

It's hard to believe 2012 went by so quickly! It was such a big year for me. New job, big move, long runs! Here's hoping 2013 is full of some great opportunities . . . and that appears to be the case so far.

The first half of my year is packed with travel, including Toronto, Phoenix, Paris (and hopefully a few side trips to Amsterdam and Belgium). They are back to back trips, so I'll be a busy woman, packing and unpacking and trying to avoid the dreaded flu.

My goal is to run another two half marathons this year. I'll plan to run the Lynchburg race in August, my third year in a row, but need to find another, flatter race to run. I'd also like to add a couple of 10Ks as well, but I'm not sure I'll run another marathon for at least another year. I'm waiting for the running bug to catch me again...it's been hard to get my head in the game where long distance running is concerned.

Crossfit is still going well - I actually love it, even though I still have to scale some of the exercises. I still can't do a handstand pushup, but it's a goal of mine this year. Everyone is so supportive and I love competing against myself and seeing what I'm really made of. I can now backsquat 95 pounds, which isn't a ton, but a lot for me!

And I've even joined the paleo bandwagon and am doing a 30 day challenge with a colleague of mine. This is week three, and I've lost almost eight pounds so far. I definitely see the benefits in cutting out all the junk of course, and while I've done pretty well cravings wise, occasionally all I can think about are waffles or peanut butter...Once I get through the thirty days, I'm committed to sticking with paleo five days a week and giving myself two days to splurge a little, within reason. I read that it will actually help reset my metabolism that way. We'll see how long I can keep up with it. I lost 40 pounds eating regular foods, but I noticed the past few months, I was binge eating and allowing myself to eat things I had given up for quite some time...too many baked goods, candy, and just junk. My regular meals were pretty healthy, but the in-between was slowing me down.

I will say this though, Paleo has really helped me expand my cooking repertoire. I've made a great vegetable soup base, which I added shrimp to in one batch and clams and sweet potatoes to in another. I'm going to try chicken next. My brother gave me a crock pot for Christmas and that has come in handy with some pretty tasty chicken dishes. I've also been a big proponent of shrimp lately and stumbled across a really tasty paleo coconut shrimp recipe, which I adapted to chicken too. I'll share the recipe the next time I make it and can post photos.

My breakfast has been the same every morning and I definitely struggle with the fact that eventually that's going to get really boring. But it appears that the only type of egg I can eat without ketchup or cheese is basically scrambled eggs...although I did manage to FINALLY make a perfect omelette the other night, so maybe there is hope. I've been really proud of myself for not indulging in ketchup or ranch dressing the past two weeks - those were certainly crutches and staples of mine. Balsamic vinegar has helped in the salad department. But I need to find new ways to eat breakfast. Scrambled eggs, turkey bacon, and strawberries is going to get old at some point.

So that's my quick update. As I venture further into crossfit and paleo, I hope to post more often. And of course, I'll share my adventures traveling, which never seem to disappoint.

Til then . . .